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10/29/2005: "“Poppin’ my blogging cherry” by Scott Allen Rinker"

I suppose I should start off by saying “hi” to the 6 or 7 people out there who read this blog stuff. So…. Hi! Guess I’ll be blogging here for the next week (how the fuck Chris talked me into is a mystery to me) but don’t expect any super funny shit, ok? I’m no Dave Hanson.
And I can’t go any further without giving a major thanks, pat on the back (not butt), and high five to the man of the hour, Chris Folino. Dude, you had a vision, which, well none of us really ever understood it, but you had it and that’s what counts. And I can’t tell you how fucking thrilled I am with the film you put together!
(I suppose I should warn everyone that yes, foul language will be used frequently here so if you have a problem with that… then, fuck off, I guess. But also please see the movie!)
One more bit of ass kissing here and then I’ll move on to the real subject for tonight’s blog. Chris, I was serious when I said this was one of the best filmmaking experiences I’ve had here in La-La land. I can’t wait to do it again. In fact let’s do that, we’ll one up Gus Van Sant and reshoot “Gamers” frame for frame but with the SAME CAST and DIRECTOR! Not even Robert Rodriguez did that! Can you feel that, baby?!
Actually, maybe since this is my first blog I’ll just keep with the whole sycophantic bullshit for now and save the rants and raves for later on this week. I only got so much crap to say, people, so forgive, all right?
So now I’ll take a moment and say that everybody on this damn thing deserves two things… one: a tremendous round of thanks for giving so much to the project and two: a huge bonus check when this thing sells! C’mon, Chris, whaddya say? It’s easy to say yes now, it’s like monopoly money, man, it doesn’t actually exist. You look all magnanimous now, and later, when you sell it, you can pretend you never even met those people. But for me it’d be great if you’d just put it in writing. No better yet, I’LL put it in writing and fax it to ya, you just sign on the bottom!
From the bottom of my greedy little heart, I do wanna say thanks to Tito, Kevin, Fernando, Jen, Manuel, Dave C. & everybody at THQ, Chris’ family (especially Rose for putting up with us in what must have been awkward timing to say the least), and finally my boys Kevin K., Kevin S. (again), Joe and Dave. If any one of you were cool, this film would not be what it is.
God, I hope they see the sarcasm and humor there otherwise I sound like a complete dick.
That’s it for tonight folks, tune in tomorrow when I try to answer the eternal question: Why does Hollywood always fuck up fantasy films? Later.